What You Resist – Persists. What You Accept – Transforms.

Are you finding yourself in a never-ending cycle of getting what you don’t want? Are the same unpleasant realities repeating themselves no matter how hard you try to avoid them? This happens because what you resist often persists!

If so, it could be that what you resist persists and what you accept transforms in something better.

Change is never painful. Only the resistance to change is painful.

What is Resistance?

It’s when you can’t accept reality as it is.

You deny its existence without even realizing it – this defense mechanism activates automatically and unconsciously. You do this to protect yourself from any negative emotions associated with unpleasant events or situations.

But denying something doesn’t mean that it isn’t there anymore – often, the very thing you’re running away from will have an even stronger effect on you! As Carl Jung said: What you resist will not only last but will also grow.

What You Resist Persists Meaning

“What you resist, persists” means that by struggling against the current reality, you actually keep it stuck in place. This can manifest in many ways.

Perhaps you’re avoiding a conflict in a relationship, resisting the urge to tackle it. By not facing the issue, you’re ensuring it remains unresolved.

This concept applies when resisting emotions, too. Denying anger often causes uncontrollable outbursts, while acknowledging it leads to understanding its root cause and healthier expression.

So, the “what you resist, persists” phrase reminds us that facing uncomfortable truths, however small, ultimately breaks destructive cycles, freeing us to make necessary changes for improvement.

Why You Attract What You Fear the Most

The unacknowledged feelings become energy centers within your unconscious mind, which build up strength over time, forcing them beyond your control. It’s like shaking a bottle of sparkling water and trying to keep the lid closed.

If you don’t let out these emotions, they act like CO2 bubbles in the bottle and must get out! Then, you unconsciously attract those events or situations that trigger the suppressed feelings so they can come to light. 

Is it Possible to Keep Emotions Suppressed Forever?

Theoretically, yes, but in the long term, this won’t do anything good for your physical and mental health.

Plus, if your life goal is development and learning, then facing challenges head-on (rather than taking the easy way out) is key here!

Allowing yourself to feel negative emotions helps transform them into valuable insights that can help make positive changes in your life.  

It might seem counterintuitive at first – but accepting an unpleasant reality instead of resisting it could be one of the smartest solutions when dealing with difficult situations.

This gives you space for growth by understanding why certain patterns repeat themselves and exploring underlying issues rather than just pretending everything’s okay all along!

Breaking the “Bad Luck” Cycle in Love

Take, for example, someone who has trouble making good partner choices in their love life – they may find themselves constantly with people who possess certain traits which they would consciously run away from.

The result is usually unsustainable relationships that eventually fall apart – leading them to feel like a victim with an internal monologue along the lines of: I have bad luck since I always run into these types of partners.

If you’ve found yourself in this example, the good news for you is that it isn’t true that you have bad luck. But, the bad news is that if this pattern keeps repeating, that means you didn’t come across such partners by chance – you unconsciously attracted them.

Bad Relationships Aren’t Chance: Why You Attract the Wrong Partners

Because your past experiences, a negative mother or father complex, or your own negative personality traits come to light through attracting partners who possess those qualities you so desperately try to avoid consciously.

For example, I had one client who kept falling for girls already taken by another man or still hung up on their exes, leading him to feel victimized and confused as to why he was ‘unlucky’ since this type of thing happened over and over again.

After exploring in psychotherapy his inner world further, he realized his emotional unavailability, stemming from a negative mother complex, was actually causing him to unconsciously seek out women who were emotionally unavailable as well.

It turns out all these women were serving as mirrors reflecting at him his own issues! 

Keep in mind that once both parties are emotionally available to each other, a true connection can occur.

Tired of the Same Patterns: Break the Cycle of Resistance

The key lies in becoming aware that what you resist persists and being willing to accept even unpleasant realities.

Remember that if something keeps happening, then it’s no coincidence but instead serves some kind of purpose within your life that needs discovering! To unravel this mechanism means expressing emotions once suppressed.

So, the next time you feel uncomfortable, don’t fight it. Remember, the more you resist, the more it stays the same. But if you accept it, you can change it for the better!

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  1. i am wondering what this means re self defense. if you or another is physically attacked do you just accept it and let the attacker carry it out as he wishes or can
    you defend yourself?

    • The concept discussed in the blog relates to emotional and psychological aspects of life, emphasizing the importance of acknowledging and addressing negative emotions rather than suppressing them. When it comes to physical self-defense, the priority should always be personal safety and the safety of others, and appropriate actions should be taken to protect against harm.

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